In the busy days of the human doer, there has become a rapid progression from breaking our backs to breaking our fingers. Technology continues to grow so fast that we can’t keep up with ourselves, requiring an increase in our devotion to working more. We don’t all move at this lightning fast speed, and most of us are able to find a work/life balance, but what about those of us who are stuck? We may have a dream and want to try new things but can’t because fear is holding us back. In order to tackle a problem, first, you must name it. Listed below are some common fears that can steal your dreams.
3 Fears We May Face:
#1: Fear of Success
Some people become so comfortable with just getting by in life that they don’t know what success would be like. In these cases, when faced with possibilities of becoming productive and more confident people, they find whatever reasons they can grasp onto and utilize them for excuses on why they don’t try. They have bought into the lie that they don’t have what it takes to be a ‘true success’ and should just accept their lot in life.
#2: Fear of Failure
Very similar to the fear of success, fear of failure will freeze people in their position on life indefinitely. These tend to be people with very low self-esteem, who will not do anything without the assistance of others attempting to motivate them to try something small. They will tell you that they will do something but procrastinate on the task, while others try to push harder, reinforcing the person’s “Do nothing right” attitude. This leads to a deeper, lower sense of self-esteem, producing a hibernating bear syndrome until something may end up getting handed to them or nothing comes their way. Becoming stuck in a fear of failure will leave someone depending on others or suffering negative consequences.
#3: Fear of Change
Fear of change can derive from becoming too accustomed to a way of life or pretending we have control over our circumstances. People stuck in this fear know very little about how a change will really turn out and this leads to anxiety, which can lead to irrational thoughts or behavior.
In all three of these cases, fear overwhelms people and hinders them from believing in themselves or holding the attitude that they can succeed. Fear prevents them from opening a window of opportunity when life slams a door on them.
Now that we have named these fears and acknowledge their power, let’s look at healthy ways to deal with them. You can face that scary feeling head on if you have the right tools in your toolbox.
3 Ways to Overcome Fears
If you think there can be a small chance of you achieving success in doing something you have a passion for, believe in yourself, believe you can do it, no matter what fear tells you. Make the decision to take action and let go of the belief that you can’t make a choice until you are certain of the outcome. Listen to motivational speakers and continue to educate yourself on your passion then write it down as a touchpoint to refer back to when the fear creeps in.
Keep a positive attitude by whatever means necessary. Some ways to maintain a positive attitude are by focusing on three things that you are grateful for every day, forgiving others and laughing often. Break the cycle of a bad attitude by changing your surroundings, whether that means getting outside and taking a walk or just walking away from negative people. If fear shows up, just smile. Even when forced, studies show a smile lowers stress and lifts endorphins.
#3 Optimistic Motivation
Instead of pretending you won’t make mistakes, embrace the mistakes as part of the process. This is optimism in action and can be embraced by saying “I can” and “Why not?” instead of “I cannot”. Tell yourself “I will try again” instead of “I’m a failure”. Imagine the very worst thing that could happen and decide what you would do if it did happen. This eliminates the feelings of the unknown. Now imagine the very best thing that could happen and how you’d feel if it did happen. This embraces feelings of worthiness and optimism.
Belief, attitude, and optimistic motivation are three enemies of fear. Placing these three components above the power of fear will open you up to new possibilities, a walk toward happiness and courage to push forward with creativity when feeling stuck in situations or current states of life. Embrace that positive mindset and look for tips to help with goal-setting to get you on the path to success.
Put these three tools in your toolbox to use when needed and for the rest of your life, understand that you can do it all because you are worth everything and in turn fear nothing. Go forth and show us what you have buried inside for much too long! You rock!
About the author: JR is a CA Addiction Treatment Counselor Level 2 (CATC II), Certified Alcohol and Drug Counselor, Alumni Coordinator, Veterans Support Group Counselor, and USMC Veteran Sgt. He spends his days helping others make positive changes and set goals on their road to recovery.
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